Penelope Standing isn’t very good at following the rules, so why should she follow a standard calendar? Here are some of her favorite holidays!
March 15: Kick a Fence Day
Given that many fences in town have been “built” by Red and Sons, it’s a good idea to kick each post before the windy season. That way you can fix it before it falls down completely, or at least prop up the dodgy sections.
April 22: Judge Your Neighbor’s Garden Day
This isn’t an official holiday, but the raised eyebrows and slow shaking of heads is most common at this time of year. If a house makes a particularly poor showing (weeds!), a quiet “Tsk!” may even be uttered.
August 17: Buy Your Dog a Cheeseburger Day
As you might expect, this is Brutus’s favorite day of the year. Penelope also buys extra for the dogs she regularly walks, at least the ones that aren’t on special diets.
February 7: Skip at Work Day
What, you’ve never seen a mail carrier skipping before? How about a dog walker? You should try it sometime!
November 1: Leave Extra Candy Out for the Mail Carrier Day
You don’t want to eat all that Halloween candy anyhow, right?
June 25: Get Doggy Drugs and Update Your Collar Tags Day
Look, in a perfect world, the people setting off the fireworks would be the ones running the streets in a panic instead of half the dogs in town, but the world is far from perfect. So this is the day to make sure that you’re prepared for what many dogs see as the end of the world. Talk to your veterinarian, and make sure your dog has a collar with tags that list your current address and telephone number.
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